haha you are the best Mom ever and yes my soul burns from the iniquity that dwells in the family but the mercy of the lord lightens my burning and fills me with his love to endure and bind myself more to his work and become a true child of my father in heaven. haha am I reading from the scriptures a lot or what? haha I love scripture talk and it is so much more fun to teach it in spanish. So my Mother yes it burns to hear the disrespect coming from them and I know you say you pray for it to be healed but I think you should not pray for it to change but for the love of Christ to fill your heart to feel passion and love not just for the ones you love and respect but the ones who hate you most. I have to admit I hate a lot of elders but instead of being a jerk to them, I find the good in them and magnify it. So as I am district leader I find alot out about the elders I am constantly watching over and loving, but there are 2 that don't want to work. But it is not my job to ask them why but to find a strong point and one step at a time strengthen the weakness and build a foundation that they can become and not just show the example but create it. It is the hardest task but I am working to get this one elder to work and truly serve the lord. He is practically done because he found a girl on the mission and has 5 months left to work. It is hard but he told me this last week "Darby you are right, I am gonna baptize this week" and guess what he did it!!!!!! The other thing that I love what you wrote is the part where you said"I didn't change that" the church changed them. SO TRUEEEEEE!!!!!! We are nothing here on earth but just instruments.
Mom I am so pumped to go home and work with the missionaries go to the temple with you and not change the personalities in the family but set the true example and make them realize that by hatred and jealousy comes not the things of the lord but from the most decieving being of all time that is more miserable and filthy than any other thing that has ever existed. Mom you have been the center of our family that taught us faith, charity and pure love of christ. This is what matters. Not the friendships with others and not the number of enemies we have but the friendships we better the enemies that we perfectly love and the witness that we always are not of satan but of the almighty that can smite thine enemies with a speck of dust that can cast out the more horrible filthy sins and forgive them and forget!!!! This word forget means not to dwell on it not to change feelings that we have and not to damage our character but to better our lives and bring us closer to our savior the one that lives, JESUS CHRIST!!!! Only through him can we rest from our pains only through him will we recieve eternal life and enter into our fathers rest. I strive to fulfill the words of Moroni "and when he shows himself unto his children again we will look at him and be the same!!!" Same as Jesus Christ. Forgiving those we hate forgiving the ones who reject us and hate us and judge us. But I say the family is the number one strength of all and if we want to be the same when he comes again we need to fulfill the words of captain moroni "protect thine families even unto bloodshed!!!" I know the earth will pass away and the devil will die but the words of Christ will never. Like Mormon said "the earth will pass and all things but my word of the words of Christ will be fulfilled whether it be through my voice or the words of my servants!!" Never have three sciptures woken me up more than these. I strongly suggest you purify your heart and humble your selves as a little child and if we humbly our selves we are gathered under his arms not for now but forever!!! Never have I felt so sad or so hurt from what our family has become. The communication is what lacks (not). The one thing that lacks is the most importnat part of the repentance process forget your self and forgive forget and never RETURN!!! I love you all Elder Darby